Monday, January 17, 2011

The last 10 months, part 2

**Initially written 1/06/11**

December 2010 - The follow up..-I had hopes of being pregnant by this point! We discuss how things have been and where things may go. He was very open to me just continuing on with the Femara and progesterone post-Ov. We decided to do more blood work on me to see how things were responding thyroid-wise; still high at 3.35, so my dosage has been double and levels will be rechecked in a while. He suggested a repeat on the semen analysis in hopes that the changes we've done have made any improvements in his swimmers, most importantly on their motility. If not, he prepared me for the likelihood that we wouldn't have much chance of conceiving naturally on our own. If the sperm aren't moving well, they aren't going to make it all the way to the fallopian tubes to fertilize the egg. Intra-Uterine Insemination (IUI) wouldn't even be an option because they still have to swim a great distance.

So we discussed the possibility of In vitro fertilization (IVF). This is something that we are 100% sure we aren't prepared to do just yet, if at all. 1st off, it is the farthest thing from natural. Hormone injections to promote follicle growth, shots to prevent ovulation, trigger shots to induce ovulation, egg retrieval surgery, sperm collection, washing, and then injection directly into the eggs, bake the eggs for a few days then insemination. 2nd, man is it expensive! Tens of thousands of dollars for the chance of maybe getting pregnant. We can't afford that. Not now and not in the foreseeable future. Our only real option at this point is to just keep trying and hoping that we can get things working soon.

I've done the ovulation prediction tests, I've taken pregnancy tests while waiting to see if my period would start, I've taken extra vitamins, fertility "supplements", taking my temperature religiously every morning, tried just about all the TTC suggestions available. I've ordered Motility boosting supplements hoping they have dramatic impacts on the "boys" before the re-test at the end of this month. I've laid still post-coital, even elevated my bum. What more can we do?

I've reached the point now that I know my body probably better than a sane person should. I've backed off most of my TTC "arsenal". I'm just taking my prescribed meds and vitamins. I'm only temping a few days before and after ovulation just for personal confirmation when I'm ovulating, so I can accurately gauge my LP length and start my progesterone supplements. I'm not peeing on any sticks, not taking extras or avoiding certain things. If I need to take meds for something, I'm not questioning if I can take them at this cycle point. If I want a drink, I have one. Heck, I'm not even trying to get it on for a *good* schedule in the hopes of it bettering my chances of conceiving. We'll do it when we want, regardless of whether I'm fertile or not, no feeling pressured to get as many times in before ovulation.

For 7 cycles, I've tried to many things, and nothing has worked. Maybe just letting things happen will make it actually happen. So here's to enjoying each day as best I can and not waiting for the next cycle marker, appreciating my husband and this time we have left with just the 2 of us, and here's to hoping that even though so many things are stacked against us, we luck out that 1 time and can have our little "slim to none" miracle child.

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