So here's just a little update about the SIL's baby shower dealio. Rather than go back-and-forth with myself over what I should do, I sent her an email. It's a bit rough and a little disjointed, I know, because if I gave it too much more thought, I never would have the balls to hit the send button.
I know [Boy] has told [BIL] what's been going on for us lately, and I'm sure he's passed that on to you.
I've received the invite from the [SIL's friend] the other week. I haven't RSVP'd for it yet, though. I am very conflicted and just wanted to take a moment to let you know why.
I would hate to say I will be there and then unable to feel I can make it come the day of the shower. I also don't want to outright say I won't be there. At this moment, I can't predict how I will feel that day and therefore, don't know how to respond to the invite. The that I was invited to at the end of last year were a bit uncomfortable and difficult for me then, so I don't know how I will handle one now. I don't want to take away from your joy on that day. All I can promise right now is that I'll try to be there. I hope you will understand.
So here's hoping she does understand that I'll be a bit wishy-washy on that subject. Now... I have to wait and see how she responds...