We've now told family and friends. The parents. B & PG-SIL. I've messaged/emailed a close friend (the one I sent the baby sling to) and filled her in, now that she's moved onto her 2nd trimester. I've told a few work friends, but that's about it.
I posted that link to my FB page a while ago and got no responses. Well, let's see what I get now that I have joined the Resolve FB page/group and liked the Self article on Infertility Awareness. These are posted on my profile and my feed. I'm also contemplating a post in the near future fully outing myself as an Infertile and that baby-making isn't easy for everyone. It is very scary, nerve-wracking, relieving and empowering at that same time.
I've started off slowly and subtly, and I'd like to think here in the next few months, I'll have it out there in the open. Where all the world can see. Where it will no longer feel like a dirty, shameful little secret that has to be kept hidden. One little step at a time, but I'll get there.
I am the 1in 6 couples that has fertility issues. I am the 1 in 4 pregnancies that end in loss. I am tired of keeping it quiet.
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Update: I just wanted to thank you all for the great comments and support! It is surprising how even just small steps such as a simple click of the "like" button can fill us with so much fear and confusion! I'm deeply grateful to have you all at my back, cheering.
My mom "liked" my link to the Self article and another friend (house-warmer) "liked" my attendance of the FF Telesummit. While it's just 2 people, it's 2 more people than the day before that know and care. Maybe after in a bit, my outings will be a bit more overt. Maybe I'll even have one in public *gasp*
On 2nd thought, probably not for quite a while yet.
I am proud of you. I thought about liking the SELF article, but wasn't ready to do it yet. But the thoughts have started in my mind. I am starting slowly by trying to reach out to my best friends. But really, good for you! The more people like you who are brave, the easier it will get for the rest of us.
ReplyDeleteGlad to help inspire!
ReplyDeleteI think you're being really brave! Can't wait to see how this progresses for you.
ReplyDeleteYou are so brave, Christina! I wish I was strong enough to be more open about IF. I'm not ready to "out" myself yet, but I think that the fact that you are is absolutely inspiring.
ReplyDeleteI'm so proud of you for outing yourself like this! You are one strong man!
ReplyDeleteWoman, I meant woman... :)
ReplyDeleteGood for you. We've come out to our close friends, and both sides of our immediate family...but haven't gone public on FB (you know, which makes everything official)..so I admire you for having that strength. I hope to be at that point someday as well.
ReplyDeleteIt does start to feel like Infertiles Anonymous, doesn't it? I hope you get the response that you're looking for. I can't imagine announcing that on FB, I look forward to hearing how it goes.
ReplyDeleteGood for you. That was really inspiring! We might have got the arse end of the statistics but we are going to make awesome amazing mums / moms when we do get there. And we wont fall into the statistics of "child abusers, drunks, bad mothers".
ReplyDeleteBTW are you going to go to the shower?
I have also come out on FB with little infertility links here and there. Usually I get no bites, not a "like" or comment. Just ignored like IF always is. This week I posted a note about "Infertility Etiquette", not something I wrote but from another blog. Within minutes I had one person IMing me wanting to know all about my brokeness. I told them I didn't want to talk about it. Then another friend sent me a message wanting to know too, I've yet to respond to that. It's too painful to talk about still for me. Maybe with some time.
ReplyDeleteYay for you. I think that it can be a very difficult thing to out yourself, but once you do you'll feel so much better. No more hiding and worrying about letting something slip.
ReplyDeleteWow - I am very impressed. You are much braver than I am. My hubby and I were just talking about telling our parents and I'm such a chicken that I'm not even sure I'll be able to do that.
ReplyDelete