Then, I'd be able to figure out what's what on a map. Then, I'd be able to figure out where the heck I am and how to get to where I want to be. I wish it was as easy as it is in the game "Life". All I'd have to do is draw the card and BAM! baby in the back seat.
Another thing crushing down on me is my SIL's impending baby shower. April 16th. I have 30 days to figure out what the heck I'm going to do. I've put off helping her friend organize it by using the "busy with work" excuse. I got the invite last week and haven't responded yet. I don't want to say yes and either make myself go or chicken out of it at the last minute. I don't want to say no and have to deal with all that goes with it for the next 30 days. Help?
EDIT: SIL and BIL know what's gone on as the Hubs told them a few weeks ago. His parents are the only other members of his family that know. Her shower is going to have other SIL and several other relatives that would definitely ask questions if I'm not there as we only live <30min away. I could make it through the shower with enough X.anax, assuming I'm not pregs by then (most likely not). I'll probably sit on it for a bit longer and see if I find any clarity. I'm pretty sure I'm just going to buy them something online as I can NOT go down the baby aisles w/o tearing up.
There are some showers you can get out of and some you can't. Me thinks your SIL is one that you probably can't. On the day if you truly don't want to go you can say that you were sick or your car broke down or any of the old excuses but sometimes we have to swallow our pain to make sure we don't hurt those that have not intentionally hurt us - only in the sense that they can conceive and we can't! I normally find I am ok once I get there and I try and be busy and when the talk goes super baby I find an excuse to wander away and "look around the garden or find a friend who kinda knows what I am going through and start a whole different conversation. Stay strong!!
ReplyDeleteWhatever you decide on the baby shower thing...you've got my support. I'm in the same boat. I have a good IF friend's baby shower on that same day. I've been staring at the invitation for two weeks...not able to respond. I feel like I've decided not to go. The last one was really hard and I am going to be on estrogen and progesterone this time around. I'm not sure that's a good combo. But...I feel so guilty about saying no. Maybe we can flip coins. :)
ReplyDeleteThat's a tough one, but my rule is if it's family or a very close friend then I go and grin and bear it. Anyone else can suck it. However, there is no right or wrong answer--go with what feels right to you.
ReplyDeleteBaby showers are tough - they just are! I usually try to suck it up and go if it's someone close, but do whatever you need to do that feels right. I hosted a baby shower a few weeks ago during the 2WW for IVF, and I was freaking out. The day before, I had a big breakdown about it and wrote a blog post about it. It made me feel better, and then what really helped were the comments that people left me, building me up. There were a couple times during the shower that I was having a hard time, and I grabbed my phone and read some comments. Knowing that I had my bloggy friends behind me helped. We're all here to support you!!!
ReplyDeleteI stall on responding to the RSVPs for baby showers. Decide the day of that I really should go and drag myself out of bed. Buy a gift on the way to the shower and get out of there as soon as you eat all their food.
ReplyDeleteI take it your SIL doesn't know what is going on with you. CAn you tell her and get a 'get out of baby shower' card? Or would that bee divulging too much? Alternatively go along and drink buckets of alcohol!
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